September 2008
13 posts
8 tags
The Shootiest Shoot Ever Shot and other news
Wrestling news that moves to MyNetworkTV this Friday!
*Did you want a shoot, Kurt Angle? Because this is a shoot! TNA fans will be mesmerized by Jeff Jarrett’s blurring of “backstage” and “storyline” elements and will each begin to wonder if they are SUICIDE.
*Did you want a shoot, random internet wrestling fan? Because this is a shoot! TNA fans will be...
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Ric Flair Institutionalized
“Middle Aged ‘n’ Crazy” Ric is headed to an institution, where he’ll enliven mental patients and, inexplicably, Scott Hall with dancing and partying and you kids and your rap music and your bass thumpin’ speakers and your text messages in class and not knowing about the jazz and your exotic pets kept in violation of city ordinances, you crazy kids.
SWERVE!...
3 tags
Maybe Their Cool Drinks Were Drugged?
FMAD passed this one on to me: Some guy says The Dream Team of Greg “Fish Camp” Valentine and Brutus “Already in 10 Halls of Fame” Beefcake was a nightmare at an indie show in Indiana. And, like JT Lightning, the guy was like, fucker!!! when faced with their antics.
Dream… nightmare… sometimes I’m just a genius.
Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake...
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Neither rain, nor sleet, nor snow, nor Diva
Shelly “Salinas” Martinez isn’t the first wrestling personality to put themselves on eBay - who could forget bidding for a chance to hang out with Road Dogg for a couple hours, or the “take Sean Waltman to family court” auction - but to win a lunch with Shelly, you have to pay… postage?
Are the unsuspecting bidders to this auction like that scene in The Big...
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Maybe "Charismatic Enigma" didn't fit the banner...
Airport incident notwithstanding, it is not very nice for Meltzer to pick on Jeff Hardy like this:
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How About The Impact Zone... In '86...
Hmm: “Suicide’s voiceover guy sounded like he was 60 years-old. Seriously, I thought the guy was going to start pimping Liberty Medical or say something witty about Bo and Luke Duke outrunning Roscoe and Boss Hogg. Somehow I don’t think that’s the image TNA was looking for.”
Hmm: “Ole Anderson turns 66 today.”
Is it coincidence, or have we discovered...
9 tags
Hitting Kurt Angle With a Board ON A POLE and...
Wrestling news that may buy up troubled mortgage giants as part of a congressional package:
*It’s time for a moratorium on hitting Kurt Angle with a board, as the aftereffects are not good. Kurt has the misguided notion that Vince Russo gimmick matches are a bad thing and can’t remember who Tito Santana is. I have a feeling Russo will work this into an angle where Kurt fights...
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Who Drugged Jake Roberts? The Exclusive...
A shocking turn in the Jake Roberts investigation, as the latest statement from Jake’s PR people suggests they’re hushing up the Hamburglar’s involvement for some unknown, sinister reason:
Prior to the show, Roberts had been offered a drink. As a recovering alcoholic he should not have accepted it. But the ramifications turned out to be far worse than potentially falling off...
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Gail Kim: Headlock on her Hart
It is hard to know what to believe about Gail Kim these days. According to reliable internet reports, she first left TNA to sign with WWE. Then she met with Johnny Ace as punishment for leaving WWE and decided not to sign because crazy old man Vince McMahon was yelling in her ear about commentary she didn’t even do. Then she ran back to Dixie Carter and said she wanted to sign an extension...
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Unforgiven Predictions
Divas Title Match: Michelle McCool vs. Maryse
Michelle McCool is the Diva equivalent of John Cena, having been pushed to the moon, while Maryse just won her first match on Friday. McCool wins after about 38 seconds, then they will dance/shop/kiss/compare chest sizes together.
World Tag Team Title Match: Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes vs. Cryme Tyme
To make up for a lack of racial diversity in...
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Regular Guy Damian Demento Will End Vince's Reign...
Renowned legal scholar Damian Demento has bypassed the Trailer Park Justice of Judge Brian Knobbs and taken his case against Vince McMahon the energy drink vacuum to a higher court: YouTube! Vince and his death squads made a Big Mistake in using the likeness of Damian Demento, who is a regular guy now, to sell WWE Magazine, which these days is just thinly-disguised Diva porn turned...